Do you become skittish around leeches? What about boats? Does the thought of a peppermint allergy cause you to quake? Are you a person frightened by frightened people? Perhaps hurricanes? Poor grammar? A secret code?

It is likely that your answers will reveal A Series of Unfortunate Events to be ill-suited for your personal use? A librarian, bookseller, or acquaintance should be able to suggest books more appropriate for your fragile temperament. But to the rarest of readers we say, “Best of luck—you're going to need it.”